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The Blog Azeroth Thanksgiving Adventure

21 Nov

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WELCOME TO THE BRAVETANK THANKSGIVING BLOGGING ADVENTURE

You are sitting before a computer. Yes this one. The one you’re sitting at right now. Unless you’re reading this on the bus on your iPhone. In which case I think you have too much money to be riding on buses. Go on – live a little and get a taxi.

Ok so there’s you and a computer of sorts. What now?

>Look

I’ve already told you what you can see.

>Look at computer

I’d rather you examined things.

>Examine computer

There you go. Well done. The computer is showing a web page.  No that’s bad grammar. The monitor is displaying a web page. After all the computer is not some glamour model demonstrating a sports car. Anyway I digress. The web page before you is colourful with a fantastic banner. The blogger is one of the nicest people you’ll ever meet online, far too critical of his own blog for some reason, generous with his praise and positive feedback to others, a fantastic artist who also does a great voice recording. Click here to visit the site and then please come back! This is only the start of your jouney.

Yes you’re back. Fantastic. You have earned 10 points. Don’t spend them all at once. Ok what now?

>Examine computer

Not that again. This is a dynamic user interface. You need to get creative.

>Touch computer

Getting fresh with your computer. Oookay

>Click link

Wow that was a left field stab in the dark out of nowhere leap of faith. And it worked! Remember- dynamic user interface. It’ll be all the rage at Christmas. You click on the link and get transported to an ancient tome, an ancient online tome full of wondrous adventures, insights, kindness and wisdom. What a discovery! Click here to have a good read- I guarantee you’ll have a great time here. Then come back. Remember there are points to be earned.

Welcome back young Indiana, I’m sure you enjoyed that. You now feel a bit parched. There is a glass of lemonade on your left and a glass of cola on your right.

>Drink lemonade

Are you just going to lean over the glass and slurp?

>Take glass

That’s better. Remember what your mother taught you.

>Drink lemonade.

You take a drink. Oooh – sharp. Suddenly you feel a little lightheaded. Your head slumps forward onto the keyboard. You lift it up & look at the monitor (or the iPhone- work with me here people). There is a new page open before you. And what a page it is. It has a reference to both sheep and diamonds. Your head spins with the possibility of  what this new world could reveal. Click here to have your entire mindset challenged and provoked.

Okay. You have been challenged and provoked. Bet you’re tired and want to watch a cartoon or something. But no- you have work to do. You also have 45 points. Don’t be pedantic now and ask how 3 sites can equal 45 points. Just open your mind to the wonders of Bravetank maths.

What now?

>Take glass

Take glass where? And yes I know that command worked earlier but remember this is a dynamic user interface. Much cleverer than the usual. I mean just think about it – how much typing have you actually done? See- very clever.

>Get glass

Not just yet. Don’t you fancy a toastie? I think there’s one by the cola if you examine desk.

>Examine desk

Lo and behold you find a toastie. Amazing. It has cheese in it. Vegetarian cheese. That’s how we roll here. You eat the toastie. After the last bite your hands start to feel strange- all tingly and stiff like…never mind. Just strange. They reach out and start typing. They are typing a web address.

>http://mapsfortanks.com/

You click here and an amazing site opens before you. It would not be an overstatement to say it holds the secrets to the world. To the World of Warcraft. Up to Dire Maul Capital Gardens at least. Your eyes widen in amazement at the maps, and the drawings on the maps. What master of the dark arts has produced these? Barely able to contain your excitement you start examining each map. Return to this page when you have satisfied your insatiable desire (ignore the contradiction in terms here) for all the knowledge in the world.

Good you’re back. Quick quiz – Where would you find Overload Ramtusk?

>World of Warcraft

Minus 10 points for stating the obvious and trying to be clever.

>Razorfen Downs

Ooh so close. 5 points for effort (and for humouring me by reading this far).

>Razorfen Kraul

Amazing. You are truly a graduate of Maps for Tanks. What now?

>Take glass

Well done. You’re catching on.

>Drink cola

You enjoy the drink. What now? (You weren’t really expecting a third magical internet occurrence were you – that would break all the rules of text adventuring parody-craft)

>Thump keyboard

Hmmm. One of us is getting a little irritable I think. Ok ok – you hit a “magic key” and the screen changes. This site is magnetic. It draws you in. What to read first? The choice overwhelms you. There is a great interview with the one they call Bravetank that you might be interested in…not pushing or anything…but honestly give it a go. See what you think. But there’s more than that there (thank god sighs every reader). This is the most sacred of sites. This is about all the blogs, all the posts, all the wisdom of this community. Click here to be taken into a world from which you will never want to return. But you’ll have to. You’re not getting those points if you don’t.

Welcome back my friend. You have 66.3 points. Well done. So far you have visited four of the very best sites on the internet – all clever, insightful, entertaining and wise. I hope you have enjoyed. I know I am very grateful to the people behind each of these blogs for the support and encouragement they have given me and the entertainment and enjoyment I have had from their sites. But where to next?

>
>
>
Ok I can see you’re stumped. And maybe a bit tired. Let me offer a suggestion. Click here if you haven’t got a blog, or go to your own blog if you do. Either way start writing. And not only will you get the full 100 points (I am a fair person) but you will also become part of a wonderful community and discover parts of yourself you might never have suspected were there.

Thank you everyone – including everyone on my blogroll I wasn’t able to name and everyone I talk to on Twitter and everyone who has supported The Raggy Dolls guild and Bravetank’s adventures. And everyone who reads this blog. You have enriched my life more than you’ll ever know.

Love

Bravetank

>Exit

Goodbye. Please visit again!

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27 Comments

Posted by on November 21, 2011 in World of Warcraft

 

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27 responses to “The Blog Azeroth Thanksgiving Adventure

  1. tomeoftheancient

    November 21, 2011 at 10:18 pm

    I’ve been anxiously awaiting your post because I knew it would be clever and funny and you never disappoint. Thank you so much for the link and the kind words.

    I wish my druid could follow Bravetank into battle but she said she just can’t swim that far even in aquatic form so I’ll keep following Bravetank’s adventures here!

    Happy Blog Azeroth Thanksgiving!

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:10 pm

      Aww thank you. And you’re very welcome for the link & kind words – all are fully deserved :) Thank you for following Bravetank’s adventures!!

       
  2. Amerence

    November 21, 2011 at 10:30 pm

    Thanks for joining us Bravetank! that was a good read! like ancient was saying clever and funny, Good Luck with your entry! This is a unique entry! that the judges sure will loved it too. Take care and Happy Blog Azeroth ThanksLinking Day! =)

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:11 pm

      Thank you! It’s such a fun event. I really really enjoyed doing it! Plus I got to play a text adventure again – of sorts! :)

       
  3. Fannon

    November 21, 2011 at 10:50 pm

    That was extremely well done, Bravetank. A unique concept that was very well executed. I quite enjoyed it.

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:12 pm

      That’s lovely. Many thanks. I’m really glad you enjoyed it. :)

       
  4. Tzufit

    November 22, 2011 at 3:31 am

    I loved this post! What a fantastic and creative idea. :) I definitely had fun going through each of the links on my “adventure.”

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:13 pm

      That’s fantastic! I’m so glad you had fun doing it and that you got to visit each of the great blogs in the links :)

       
  5. Cym (@Cymre)

    November 22, 2011 at 3:36 am

    Very clever post there…

    GL with your entry!

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:14 pm

      Thank you!! I’m glad you liked it. I got quite carried away doing it :)

       
  6. LabRat

    November 22, 2011 at 4:38 am

    That was awesome.

    And now I want a cheese toastie. Perhaps lunch tomorrow.

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:14 pm

      Thank you!! And of course I have to ask- did you have your cheese toastie?!! You can’t beat them can you!

       
  7. Danslate

    November 22, 2011 at 6:05 am

    I …
    You …
    But …
    And … the start page, too …
    I’m … at a loss for words …I

    Thank you for your online comraderie, support, assurance that the blog I occasionally write on doesn’t totally suck, and of course for the entertaining hours I was lucky enough to have spent reading and laughing about (and in one case voice-acting) your blog posts.

    You deserve all the link love from MMO Melting Pot and the others. And I’m sure that 1. there will be many more link love in the future, and 2. you’re not as bad a tank as you want everyone to believe.

    Now I feel like a douchebag (or douchecanoe, whatever floats your boat…haha, get it? canoe…boat…Germans really are NOT funny) for not having something in return…

    And, since I already feel like one (and because I CANNOT leave a comment without SOMETHING sarcastic): don’t think I didn’t notice the sentence “No, that’s bad grammar.” in the same paragraph where the link to my blog is. That is no coincidence! =)

     
    • Bravetank

      November 22, 2011 at 5:24 pm

      I hope I’m not subconsciously attacking your grammar via my blog! That would be quite disturbing! One day I’ll show off my fantastic German grammar in a post. Actually I learnt French in school not German (I think we had to choose) but I did learn how to count to five in German – I’m very proud of this skill!

      Anyway regarding the thanksgiving link & thanks – you’re very very welcome – I really have been so grateful for all your support ever since I started writing the blog. It really has been so encouraging. Tanking wise- you should have seen me in Sunken Temple the other day! I actually hit things & stuff. But then it turned nasty. Not going to say anymore at this stage – will have to write about it to get it out of my system. All I’ll say is I think I accidentally might have been a ninja :( – don’t know how to live with myself!! It’ll have to be confession time!!

       
  8. Sherry [Mia]

    November 22, 2011 at 5:17 pm

    haha! I got a good laugh out of this post! Nice one, sir :D

     
    • Bravetank

      November 24, 2011 at 6:04 am

      Thank you :) Glad you enjoyed it! I had fun writing it!

       
  9. Karegina

    November 23, 2011 at 7:01 pm

    I love this!! It reminded me of my old MUD-ding days!! Good job!!

     
    • Bravetank

      November 24, 2011 at 6:05 am

      Yes the MUDding days & text adventure games hold lots of good memories! I’m glad you liked it :)

       
  10. navimie

    November 24, 2011 at 8:31 am

    What a cool idea Bravetank! I really enjoyed it, totally original. Good luck with your fab entry!

     
    • Bravetank

      November 26, 2011 at 9:43 am

      Thank you!! Really glad you enjoyed it! :)

       
  11. Effraeti

    November 27, 2011 at 6:10 pm

    Great post! I think this is my favorite Blog Azeroth Thanksgiving post so far. I love the King’s Quest-esque style of typing in What Do You Want to Do? until you want to smash your forehead against the keyboard, because you have no idea what this game wants you to do!!
    <3

    ~ Effy

     
    • Bravetank

      November 28, 2011 at 6:07 pm

      Thank you! And yes I know that frustration all too well from my own old text adventure days – why I put myself through such torture I’ll never know!!

       
  12. kamaliaetalia

    November 28, 2011 at 6:40 pm

    Oh, a text adventure! Such great memories! Indeed, blogging is a fabulous adventure in text ;)

     
    • Bravetank

      December 1, 2011 at 6:14 pm

      I like that way of thinking about blogging an adventure in text! That’s great!

       
  13. Lowtec

    December 7, 2011 at 12:02 pm

    Great post, thank you very much für the awesome entertainment :)

     
    • Bravetank

      December 7, 2011 at 7:18 pm

      You’re very welcome :) Glad you enjoyed it :)

       

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