The Medivh Files

With Medivh featuring prominently in the Warcraft movie, hosting a fantabulous Hearthstone party at disco central Karazhan and with Karazhan also reappearing in Legion – well it’s time to reveal a few unknown facts about the world’s favourite Guardian.

Fact 1: Although usually rather serious, circumspect and secretive (indeed his name means “keeper of secrets” in the high elven language) Medivh would gossip like a fishwife/husband (yes no un-pc jokes here) with garden slugs and snails. However, he would immediately stamp on them if caught in the act and then claim Sargeras  made him do it.

Fact 2: Would laugh like a drain at any joke involving a three legged cow, a blind cat and a dead fish. Would weep for hours if the joke involved a blind cow, a three legged fish and a dead cat as this was a bitter reminder of the childhood pets he never had but always wanted.

Fact 3: Was not possessed against his will by Sargeras. Sargeras tried to leave several times finding Medivh’s penchant for gossiping with slugs and snails disturbing. Medivh regularly convinced Sargeras to stay by remarking that it was raining outside and wasn’t it a pity Sargeras hadn’t brought an umbrella.

Fact 4: Pretended to be in a coma for 20 years during which time he was trying to figure out the door puzzle from Labyrinth. Still doesn’t get it.

Fact 5: After being killed by Khadgar Medivh was resurrected by his mother’s spirit. This was only to continue their longstanding argument about the correct way to fold a bath towel. Aegwynn insisted on folding from left to right, Medivh insisted on rolling it up in a ball and urinating on it. Sadly this argument was never resolved.

Fact 6: Medivh only invited the orcs to Azeroth for Sunday tea. Was surprised they wanted to stay longer. While in public he continued to be the welcoming host privately he criticised their bad manners to his favourite snail.

Fact 7: Medivh is a big Thrall and Jaina shipper and coined the name Thipper. It never caught on due to its spittle inducing effects which Khadgar found hilarious.

Fact 8: Never intended to turn into a black raven. The spell was meant to transmogrify him into a dancing penguin. However, something went very wrong and the penguin now only appears very occasionally. However, if you spend a lot of time in Karazhan drinking heavily there is a 1% chance to will see the penguin dancing with the horses in the stable. If so you should report this on twitter using the hashtag  #IFoundtheDancingPenguininKarazhan. Blizzard developers need to know.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s