Call My Bluff

I feel sorry for Lord Magmathar. He’s sat (as far as elementals can sit) atop a mountain in Ashenvale, tasked with destroying the entire zone. But he’s just a level 24 with 6500 hp. So it’s all doomed to failure. All he can really do is talk some smack and hope that scares everyone off. He’s a bit like Professor Marvel hidden behind the curtain in Oz.

As I cleared the other elementals in the area he said the following things:-

The Earthen Ring cannot withstand my fury!

Said with a nervous tremor in his voice.

ASHENVALE WILL BURN!

Caps used for maximum effect. Poor netiquette. Note he is also yelling.

There is no escape! There is only the fiery embrace of my lava!

This said as I methodically wipe out his minions.

Like moths to the flame!

Translate: “This is scary, my plans are going awry, ok let’s pretend this is exactly what I wanted all along”

Scorch the ground, boil the water, and ignite the skies!

Mag’s answer to how do you make the perfect cup of coffee. Not quite right but he’s having a go.

Destroy them, my minions!

This said as I kill the last one.

Death rises from below and erupts from above! There is no escape!

This said as he looks over his shoulder and considers throwing himself off the mountain.

I am free of the bonds of the earth never to return again!

Translate: I wish I was a squirrel.

Poor Magmathar. Given a task far too hard and then forced to bluff it out for as long as possible.  Workers of the world unite.

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