Month: February 2012

I Hate Bombing

Some of you who have stumbled on this site looking for an important and perhaps even thought provoking anti-war tirade are going to be disappointed by the frivolity of this post. Or a little angry. Or maybe so genuinely puzzled and bemused you end up stumbling to the fridge looking for some solace and sanity in  a Kit Kat. Unless of course you are my until now undiscovered soul mate who knows exactly what bombing I’m referring to without me having to spell it out because it’s so obvious, because you’ve been there, felt it and endured it. In which case I hope your therapist laughed less than mine when you told him/her about it. I’m referring of course to the bombing of Skettis – that awful daily that I’m currently putting myself through daily (clue is in the name I know) to get a flying jellyfish – or nether ray – whatever the hell they’re called.

What a dreadful dreadful quest. It’s hell. Sheer hell. Shall I list what’s wrong with it? Please can I? The therapist is insisting on charging me double if I continue to waste her time with this crap. Ok…

1. The big birds that attack you just when you’re about to bomb their eggs. I mean how unreasonable is that. I am just trying to destroy their young, their precious next generation, and they have the gall to get all tetchy about it and come swooping down on me, hamstringing me and my mount and making me fall to the ground- dying in the undignified way of one too panicky to click slowfall properly.

2.Trees – there are trees and leaves everywhere. They get in the way and make me feel all smothered and claustrophobic when I fly around. Also they make it more difficult to find those eggs. It’s making me a total supporter of deforestation. You wouldn’t get this hassle if it was a concrete jungle filled with high rise flats with the eggs neatly lined up on top. Blizzard and nature take note – we need more concrete.

3.That annoying guy who daily needs to be released from the prison in one of the trees. He never moves once I release him. He says something like “Let’s get out here” but then stands there, like he’s expecting me to carry him or something. I end up running off a bit and then stopping and looking back at him encouragingly (yes my WoW character has all sorts of facial expressions – hasn’t yours – how odd). Eventually he comes – sauntering along like one not that keen on escaping a prison in which he was kept relatively well fed and watered. Actually now I think about it that’s probably why he ends up back there each day- after we get to the foot of the stairs and he says “Great thanks!” he probably waits until I’m not looking and runs back up to lock himself in. Total time waster.

4. For this daily hell I get the pleasure of seeing my rep bar with the Shatari Skyguard creep up millimetre by millimetre. They are never that impressed with me unless I bring back a load of shadow dust as well- the thought of which makes my hands all itchy.

5. It’s nowhere near Ogrila – the other place I apparently need to go if I am to sufficiently win the Shatari over to my cause -enough anyway for them to be willing to sell me (sell me mind- not give me – they have to like me enough to let me spend my money with them – the world is mad) a nether ray. And they know I’ll do it. Because I’m that desperate to add another mount I’ll never use to my collection. This game is both a dream and nightmare for any “completionists” like me (i.e. neurotic, OCDish and obsessed).

Compare this daily with the lovely Wintersaber one. I get the little cub out each day. He either wants some meat or a toy. Aww bless. I fly a few feet away, one shot a couple of owlkins, yetis, bears or winterfall shamans (who killed me enough times when I was levelling for me to enjoy every single one I bring down) and then turn in the quest. He yawns in a very satisfied manner. I store away yet another whisker and we’re all happy. One day nearer to the mount. It’s clear, definable, enjoyable and most important of all really really EASY!

Yes I want these dailies to be easy. I don’t want to be attacked by birds or blinded by leaves. In  fact come on Arrakoa – just lay up all your eggs in a row just outside the camp and let me come along and blast them with arcane barrage. You’ll have less squawking mouths to feed (and bloody hell they grow up aggressive) & I’ll get my flying jellyfish. We’ll all be happy. And throw a bit of concrete down while you’re at it.

All the sixes clickety click

Oooh I’ve been tagged a couple of times in the 666 meme. Only problem is I lost most of my WoW images when I has to reinstall recently. Not that I had that many actually – always forget to snap the good things because I’m usually too busy doing my shoulder dance of celebration.

But I do have 7 images in my image folder- all very recent & so topical to this blog I guess. The 6th one is this:-

It was only taken last Thurs when I had just had the swift lovebird and then gone on to hit 60 and make and ride my flying carpet! A good evening. As you can see I’m telling Jacky in guild chat all about it & she is being very lovely and congratulating me! I was very happy 🙂

There are three other photos I want to upload though – non WoW related – but the 1st is the 6th photo in the most important of my folders – my Dog folder and the second two just because I can’t resist!

So photo 6

That’s Eddie on the left and Rosie the brown dog on the right – two of the most important things in my life. Rosie sadly passed away a few months ago. I think about her and miss her every day. She was 17 years old when she died and the cutest, friendliest and noisiest dog ever (she was once nearly thrown out of a dog show because of all her barking!).

Here she is in close up.

The most beautiful eyes ever. I love and miss her so much.

And here’s trouble – Eddie – our shadow and devoted companion. He has Peter & I wrapped well and truly around his paw.

I think you’ll agree he’s the strangest plant ever.

So forgive me for indulging in the dog photos – couldn’t resist when I saw how sparse my WoW image folder was.

And here are my 6 tagged bloggers – this could run & run!

Tome of the Ancient

The Ready Check


Jinxed Thoughts

I can do alts, me


Defying Gravity

My excitement knows no bounds. Not only have I had my swift lovebird (see last post) but I’ve also now got the companion Peddlefeet and a flying carpet.  And what’s more – I’ve finally plucked up the courage to make and WEAR the black mageweave set.

I think husband slightly disapproves of the outfit. I told him that she has a cool yellow cloak and he said, “No one will be looking at her cloak.” He then said he hoped I hadn’t spent too much on the cloth since there didn’t actually seem to be alot of material in the outfit. His attitude isn’t helped by the fact some young man (I think- but who knows in this game) was so enamoured by my name the other day that he told me he loved me and offered to get me lots of cloth for my tailoring. Husband thinks I’m attracting the wrong types. I think anything that speeds up my tailoring is worth considering.

Anyway in regard to the outfit – is there such a thing as dressing inappropriately in the game? Can you show too much thigh and buttock? I wrote about this over on the F Word site in the “You’ll Catch Your Death in That” article. I’m still battling with some of the same issues now as then.But I like the outfit so I’ve taken the plunge. She’s embracing her right to wear what she wants to wear – no matter how chilly it gets or how her thighs chafe.

In other Seashell news- she is nearly topping the dps charts in most dungeons apart from the one I ran around equipped with a fishing rod…! It’s so nice to be effortlessly powerful as opposed to all my other characters who are strenuously weak. Also everytime I put focus magic on someone I feel great and magnanimous – you’d swear I’d just done a five hour stint in a soup kitchen. “There you go- have some extra critical hit from me. No don’t thank me please. Oh you weren’t going to. What a surprise.”

To be fair I’ve actually had some good groups of late. There have been a few new tanks (Seashell is 63 so running with the Death Knight crew). The ones I’ve met have been quick to confess their inexperience and courteous to all. How long before the brutality of the dungeon world beats that out of them? One even fairly won a need roll then offered it up to the other person who’d lost saying “You need it more than me.” Amazing. I’ve stayed with a couple of groups for 2 or 3 dungeons which for me is a sign of commitment on a par with getting engaged.

Had an addon fest this morning. When I had to reinstall the game a few weeks back I lost my add ons and I hadn’t got round to re-downloading them until today. Went for Auctioneer, Tidy Plates, Decursive, Mage Nuggets (which makes me whisper something like, “Thank you for Innervating me” – which sounds slightly obscene I think), something on Achievements (the Overachiever?) which is helping me /love all the critters I need to, and Atlas Loot which I adore. It has made me very focussed in dungeons – since I actually know what items might drop I can “enjoy” that lovely tense moment just after the boss dies and we wait to see what’s dropped. Husband has been a tad shocked at the vulgarity of my language when something stupid in plate inevitably appears.

Fishing and cooking continue – I’m on a quest for Enormous Barbed Gill trout so if anyone knows the best spot for them let me know. Wowhead has sent me to all sorts of places but so far I’ve only caught one (and been killed several times – can’t believe fishing is so dangerous – I’m clearly doing it wrong). I’m getting all excited at what I’m hearing about Dalaran cooking and fishing dailies – is it really the promised land? I want to make Delicious Chocolate Cake. I can’t believe I’ve reached the dizzy heights of the 350s in all my professions (Archaeology doesn’t count of course  – it’s still on something like minus 7 ).

So it’s been a good couple of WoW days. I seem to be making real progress, actually enjoying the dungeons and meeting some really nice people who have been a pleasure to run with. Now who’d have ever thought I’d say something like that!!

Blizzard the Creator

I think we all agree that Blizzard has produced an absolutely awesome game in WoW. But it’s only occurred to me today that they are better Creators than the big man himself (or big woman, creative universe, evolutionary power, swimming turtle – whatever you believe in) himself since I think if Blizzard had created the human body they’d have done a better job.

Oooh bold statement from Bravetank – has she gone crazy? No I don’t think so (although I am talking about myself in the third person so it’s quite possible). I just can’t imagine the human body getting past the development stage in Blizzard. Although suddenly I’m getting a vision…a conversation that happened at the dawn of time…it went something like this….

The Dawn of Time

Young Developer: Creator, I have a great idea

Creator: Ok – but it better not be that panda thing again

YD:Ha ha no that was just a joke. No one would really take that seriously.

C: Ok what’s your idea.

YD:A thing called a human

C:Ooh sounds intriguing – how does it work

YD:Well it has two legs, walks upright, two arms, can hold things at the same time as walking. That’s the main thing about this creation.

C: Holding things while walking?

YD (Proudly): Yep

C: Does it have a brain? Can it also think while it does so?

YD: Sort of. The male version will struggle.

C:Why is that?

YD: Well to help it reproduce we’ve had to create both male and female versions and take a bit of the material used for the brain in the woman to make the reproductive tool in the man. It’s a bit of a drawback. A later patch will resolve it.

C: Ok we can live with that. Tell me more.

YD: It will be able to eat the food of the land for energy.

C: Excellent – no daily manna from heaven needed. No waste as well. I like that.

YD: Umm-there will be a bit of waste.

C: What do you mean?

YD: Well when it eats it will take what nutrients it needs from the food but will then have to dispel the remainder.

C: Dispel? How do you mean.

YD: From the body.

C: From the body! How do you intend doing that?

YD: I was going to make a hole somewhere. Doesn’t matter where. It’ll come out from the hole.

C: Sounds untidy. Will it mess up my beautiful land.

YD: Well I was thinking they could build repositories for the waste.

C: Repositories?

YD: Yes, I don’t know- something to capture it and take it away. Into the sea is probably best – you went a bit mad with all that water.

C: Yes I did get get a bit carried away. Hmm….but this means wherever they go they will need things built in which to deposit their waste. Sounds like a faff to me. I’m not convinced. Tell me more – what about the reproduction side?

YD: Well the man will fertilise an egg in the woman and the woman will give birth to a child

C: How does she give birth?

YD: You know it’s funny but I hadn’t thought of that. I know- I’ll make another hole

C: Another one? Are you making a human or a sieve?

YD: Haha – no it will be ok. It won’t be too big.

C: But big enough for another human to pass through I take it?

YD: Weeeelllllllll….it might need to stretch a bit. I’ll put a bit of elastic in there. It’ll be ok. I’m sure.

C: What about talking? Do they do that?

YD: Yes – there will be a voice box. It’s the newest thing to come out of the labs.

C: Yes I saw the flier. But don’t voice boxes need an outlet? I seem to recall reading that.

YD: Umm yes…so I was thinking….

C: Let me guess – another hole?

YD (smiling broadly): Exactly!

C: I’m sorry. I don’t think this is going to work. Could later patches improve the design?

YD (uncertainly): Possibly. But there can’t be too many patches.

C: Why not?

YD: Well the product will only work for a certain amount of years. Probably 80 or so, if treated very carefully so as not to catch any bugs.

C: 80 years! What’s the point in that?

YD: Well Creator – this is where this comes in.

C: What’s that?

YD: A game – called World of Warcraft – these humans will buy it in their millions.

C (Interested): Buy it you say. For money?

YD: Lots of money. In fact they will pay regularly for it – each month. You know what that means?

C: I can get my yacht?

YD: Exactly

C: Ok let’s go for it. But don’t invest too much in the humans. I just want them working well enough to buy the game. Anything else will be a waste. Put your best developers on World of Warcraft, the second best on Diablo and stick the rest on this.

YD: You’ve got it Sir.

Well it seems I channelled something there – a divine revelation into the meaning and purpose of human life. Now it all makes sense. We’ll never be as good as Diablo or WoW because we were only made to buy them. That’s the sole reason for our existence. And to top it all we’re full of holes too. No wonder we get depressed!

All Grown Up

Aaargh total pressure. This might be a blog post actually read by Blog Azeroth people. I was selected Blog of the Week on Sunday and it’s only now occurred to me (Tuesday) that I actually need to post something (I’m a bit slow on the uptake).

It’s a good time to post though because this week I feel I’ve finally reached a milestone. I’m a real WoW player. I’m doing dailies. Properly. You know – making sure I do them regularly (one might even say daily).

When I first started reading online about WoW and listening to podcasts everyone would talk about doing dailies. It sounded really important. I wondered what it would be like to have dailies to do. How did you get them? Was there a quest line that led to them? They had a total mystique about them. I imagined telling my mother importantly on the phone, “Can’t talk sorry I’m doing dailies,!” and her being suitably impressed by her daughter.

It’s similar to when I was younger – I heard someone say they “owed” their sister 50p. I was awestruck. What did owing mean? I couldn’t conceptualise it at all.All I knew was I equated growing up with being able to owe something. Sadly how right I was.

Of course it’s not that I’ve only recently done my first daily. I have done some previously – in an ad hoc fashion. I never stuck it out for long – a bit of Knights of the Ebon Blade stuff for Terema until I tired of Icecrown (day 2), the Winterspring Frostsaber for Luxmi (I am proud of that one I have to admit!) and..well … that was it. But now it’s a very different story.

With Seashell my level 48 mage I have become quite obsessed with dailies. Every day she does her fishing & cooking ones- both because I want to level them & because I want to get the achievements you get when you do all the fishing dailies in one area, all the cooking ones in one area etc. And I’m actually sticking with it and even enjoying it. I like getting my little green bag after the fishing one & the chef award after the cooking. It is strangely satisfying. And on top of that right now she is also doing the Darkmoon Faire ones (even the annoying games – I’ve become quite the tonk expert) and then the Love is in the Air ones – running around delivering bracelets to the Alliance lords and masters like a deranged suitor.

On top of the dailies thing I’m also finding myself very Achievements focused with her. I’m actually looking at the 100 Mounts achievement and thinking yes I could do that (I’m totally deluding myself of course but that’s beside the point – I have aspirations). The What a Long Strange Trip It’s Been is turning into one of my top priorities in life. What’s happening to me? Seashell’s WoW journey seems so different from any of my other characters. She is doing professions, fishing & cooking, getting reps up, trying to collect mounts and companions and now trying to get some mega achievement. Levelling is turning out to be rather incidental to her journey. It happens while I’m doing other things like finding an area offering me skill up for skinning, exploring new areas in which to fish, running dungeons in tabards to build rep. It’s a much more holistic journey and feels a more well rounded experience. She’s even got her own style courtesy of transmogging.

And the whole thing has reminded me just how great a game this is – it can offer so much variety, so many ways in which to play your character and spend your time online. I know other people feel differently but I personally really do still love playing this game and I’m still finding fresh ways to enjoy it. They say to try to find things in life that get you in the zone – a state of total absorption. It is said to be a good state to be in because it usually means your mind has stopped wandering off to the past or future and is instead in the present. My mind needs that – very much so – and WoW offers it to me. That’s a good thing.

I’d rather have an eye patch

Before I start – just wanted to thank everyone for their kind comments and support after the last post. I do appreciate it. Tank you (I mean Thank you – how Freudian was that?!).

Ok Wow news! Well it’s not good actually (never rains etc!) I’m having to reinstall WoW from scratch. That bloody latest patch has totally messed it up for me. Tried all sorts of fixes and cannot get the optimization thingimajig to work. Just freezes from the start. How arrogant is the whole idea of optimization? I should be able to choose what is optimised when. What next? Blizzard employees to come round the house and optimise my living space (actually I wouldn’t mind that – maybe they could get rid of the stairs  and set up the house with some sort of Nagrand swing bridge affair). Anyway I digress. It’s the stress of inserting, removing and reinserting CD after bloody CD. My fingers ache (yes older generation- I know you did all sorts of hard stuff down mines while surviving on coal sandwiches or whatever – but try reinstalling this monster of a game. Then you’ll know suffering.) Anyway the thing is I have no idea if this will work either. And typically the minute you can’t play something you really desperately want to. I even have a hankering to wander around Shattrath – god how desperate am I? SHATTRATH?! And I had so many hopes for Seashell this weekend (yes I know I should be playing Bravetank but think of Seashell as just a mage version of Bravetank – same horror stories in dungeons just viewed from the back with less wrong turns (although get me – I was asked to guide the group the other day since- amazing- I was the only one who knew the way. A proud moment.) Of course if I’m not talking about Bravetank then you are losing out on my tanking wisdom…hmm ….yes…exactly….

But also playing Seashell recently has allowed me to revisit all the early dungeons again and see how other tanks do it. Some do it better. They don’t cry and stuff. Show offs. But some thankfully do it far far worse! Which is nice to know.

The following is just some of what I’ve been involved in over the past few weeks (pre patch – oh those heady innocent days):-

1. Tanks that claim to be the leaders, demand we follow them no matter what (deranged egomaniacs), but then show they have no clue about the dungeon at all by leading us to our deaths. And in most cases – because we’ve been indoctrinated to think the tank is Queen (or King –  yes yes I know some men play tanks too but who takes them seriously in that skimpy gear …oh sorry got that the wrong way round) we follow. And when you don’t …oh lordy lord. Then it all kicks off. The best example of this was in Uldaman where one of the DPS did that thing you do (hmm “that thing you do” – that could be the name of a film – or it is –ok – move along) to make the huge lady boss comes out (you know – the one that could take the Statue of Liberty lady in a fight) but the tank & healer didn’t realise (or care) & carried on pulling another group of mobs further on. They died. Quickly. The two other DPS and I fought the boss valiantly but ended up dying too. Someone mass ressed us and then it started. The tank blamed us for not following even when they were wrong, the DPS said they couldn’t since the boss had been summoned, insults started flying, mothers were discussed. Then the thing came up to boot the tank – but I (stupidly) thought we should give him another chance. Everyone can get it wrong I thought. So I refused to kick much to the other DPSs annoyance.  We carried on fighting. A fantastic cloth chest item dropped that was a massive upgrade for me. I rolled need because there was no arguing about it – this was good for me. And the tank rolled need too!! I couldn’t believe it. And he won!! I’d saved him and he did that to me. This time I initiated the vote kick – maybe petty I know but honestly– and this time he went. I’ll probably never give anyone the benefit of the doubt again (so sorry husband if I find your head in some other woman’s cleavage- no benefit of the doubt from me).

2. The other great experience was in Scarlet Monastery Cathedral. Now I admit I’ve done that so many times now I finally know the tactic – kill all the mobs before going anywhere near the boss. Only took me like 100 times- I am totally improving my gameplay. I also know that not everyone else knows this. For some people it’s their first time in there and I know only too well what that’s like so I am very nice and stuff. But there was one tank recently who just seemed to relish pulling everything in sight deliberately. In the beginning I think he did it because he honestly thought he was so great he could handle it. But when that failed he tried to make it look like he was doing it on purpose (a “That didn’t hurt” sort of thing, and “See I really really want to die a thousand deaths, I loves it I does” – I’m convinced he spoke like that). He was typing lots of cackling laughter into Party chat while we died again and again and my little armor guy was getting redder and redder until I started fearing it would all fall off). I could feel my hatred rising. Why didn’t I just leave you might be wondering? Well it was greed and vanity pure and simple. I wanted – nay desired with a purple passion – the Whitemane chapeau for Seashell. First time I’ve ever deliberately sought a special item of clothing. I’ve become all superficial and stuff. She’ll be waxing lyrical about manolo blahniks or whatever they’re called before you know it and then I might just have to hit her over the head with my Deadwood boxset until she starts valuing dirt, dust and cussing again. Anyway I wanted to wear this delectable head item with my self made Robes of Power (Seashell is an  accomplished tailor & will of course go into business full time when she tires of all this arcane barraging). And it did drop for me in the end & I did win the need roll so I guess it was worth the repair bills but not the stomach ulcer, blood pressure and all the material spent on a voodoo doll of that little tank.

On the subject of my outfit by the way (I think I’m actually channelling Carrie Bradshaw now…no wait…just checked – still have a braincell so I’m ok ….I know I know miaow)- I actually have gone past the level of Robe of Power so have transmogged another piece to look like it (my first bit of mogging). The chapeau looks gorgeous with it I think…. but someone made fun of me in Stormwind. “Nice transmog they said” which I took at face value at first but they followed it up with “lololol” which I take it is not good. Would have posted a screenshot but as you might have heard I’M HAVING TO REINSTALL ALL OF WOW AGAIN

Anyway in the time it’s taken me to write the above I’m on Wrath of the Lich king which is taking ages and is accompanied by background music that is just…’s no Glee I tell you that. Anyway lovely. Great way to spend a Saturday. Please all join together and pray to Elune that it works for me once they’re all installed – I need WoW, I do, I even miss Dire Maul now. This is getting bad.

Oh and before I go I’ve also written something for the F Word site – if you’re interested it can be found here.